If You Think Being Fat is Bad

You would not say it out loud, but you might think that being fat makes you bad.  Worthy of mockery.  Deserving of shame.  The worst thing in the world.

It’s not.

Being fat is a situation you might find yourself in if you have been in the habit of overeating or bingeing.  It might be a physical revelation of inflammation or hormonal imbalance or lingering weight from past pregnancies.

But being fat, having excess body mass, weighing more than other people, does not make you bad.

If you have ever thought that you are a bad person for being overweight, it is because you believe that fat is wrong.

You might believe this because you think the way to to get fat is to overeat, and overeating is wrong, so fat is wrong.

You might believe this because you think fat is ugly, or requires laziness, or dirtiness, and all of those things are disgusting which makes fat disgusting which makes you disgusting.

While some people do become fatter for eating too much or never moving their bodies, they do not become worse people, and they do not deserve public shaming.

Being fat may complicate your life (as may being thin) for a variety of reasons, but remember that fat is only extra weight your body is holding onto.

It is not your soul, your spirit, your mind.  It isn’t your sense of humor, or your generosity, your intelligence, kindness, love, or wonder for the world.

It is a physical condition, and that is all.

You can lose weight.  You can gain weight.  And in the end, you choose what you believe about it.  You choose what you do about it.

I am not suggesting that it does not matter if you are fat.  Being fat may make you suspect to disease, early death, or a difficult life (physically, at the very least, emotionally, because other people, including yourself, may view your fatness as a problem needing to be shamed).

What I am suggesting is that it matters how you view fat.

If you are fat, how do you view yourself?

Lazy?  Glutton?  Unfortunate?  Ugly?  Victim?  Bad?

You have not become a worse person for weighing more than you did at another point in your life, or more than people around you.

You can believe that or not, but try to keep perspective in the matter.

Hatred is bad.  Injustice is bad.  Bitterness is bad.

But extra weight is just extra weight.  Decide if you want to do anything about it, accept the situation you are in, and move forward how you like.

Reserve disdain for those tragedies that deserves such negative feelings.

Your body isn’t one of them.

Image from Pinterest.

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Eating Enough to Reduce Urges to Binge, Part 4

This is Part 4 of the Series: Eating Enough to Reduce Urges to Binge.

You can read what has been posted so far by clicking on the link above.

In Part 1, I wrote about how under-eating can lead to urges to binge.  Part 2 went over the physical and mental signs of under-eating, and Part 3 gave examples of what under-eating might look like for the average person who wants to eat healthy, but very well might be under-eating and experiencing urges to binge.

Part 4 will offer suggestions on increasing your eating to reduce the urge to binge.

It seems crazy to suggest increasing how much you eat when we are bombarded with the message to eat less.  Eating less has its place, and is an effective way to lose unwanted weight, but eating less is not usually the most effective approach for those who are caught up in the habit of binge eating.  Eating less is usually what triggers the actual urges to binge, increasing the likelihood of binge eating.

It is worth considering removing the period of dieting (under-eating) that leads up to urges to binge as a means to experience less binge urges.

This is a practical approach, but may be very intimidating or even scary to the person who is used to under-eating and bingeing.

I suggest exploring this approach as quickly or slowly as it appeals to you.  The reason for this is that our actions tend to follow our thoughts (beliefs) and if you do not believe that eating more will reduce your urges to binge, you likely will not enjoy the process of eating enough and you might not stick with it.

This does not mean that eating more is not an effective approach to reducing binge urges because it certainly is!

It only means that eating enough will be frustrating and uncomfortable for you if you do not believe that it is a plausible practice.

Bingeing is a physical act that requires physical action to end, but all physical actions begin as a thought, often subconsciously and emotionally.  Putting the effort into ending binge eating requires both a physical and emotional change in approach, so go easy on yourself as you explore the two, and get comfortable with your own growth, no matter what its speed.

Some benefits of eating more throughout the day besides experiencing less urges to binge are:

  • Feeling more satisfied after meals.
  • Feeling more satisfied after snacks (if you need them at all).
  • Experiencing less anxiety around food.
  • Experiencing freedom to think about more than just food and eating.
  • Reduced discomfort from dieting.
  • Increased concentration.
  • Increased focus.
  • Increased sexual desires.
  • Improved moods.
  • Improved digestion (assuming you are bingeing less or not at all).
  • Increased ability to eat along the usual meal schedules of those around you (this is more of a convenience).
  • Bingeing less (and not at all).
  • Less regret, guilt, and shame attributed to bingeing.
  • Weight loss (if it was needed).
  • More stable hormones.
  • Freedom to enjoy your life without the burden of binge eating.

So, on that positive note, here are some ways that you can increase your eating which will reduce your urges to binge:

  • Increase the portion sizes of your meals.  If you have two eggs for breakfast, try adding an extra egg (or two).
  • Add new foods to your meals.  If you have eggs for breakfast, try adding some avocado or some spinach, or some olives, or fresh fruit.  If you have yogurt, try adding some macadamia nuts.
  • Add healthy fats to your meals.  Fats will keep you fuller longer and definitely add to your satiety levels.  You can experiment with olive oil, coconut oil, nuts, seeds, avocado, olives, butter, ghee or even lard (best from organic sources).  No need to worry about the extra calories from a serving of fat–extra calories are the whole idea in this experiment!
  • Increase the amount of protein you eat at each meal.
  • Add some satisfying carbohydrates to your meals.  Carb have gotten a bad wrap over the last twenty or so years, but provided you do not base your entire diet on them, they can be a very beneficial addition to your diet (especially if you exercise or are a female with hormonal imbalances).  Try sweet potatoes, white potatoes, yucca, carrots, beets, white rice, bananas, or plantains.  I generally advise sticking with vegetables and fruits as your carb choices simply because gram for gram, they are more nutritious than grains and legumes (but do not feel that you cannot have grains or legumes!).

These are only a few ideas for increasing your food intake so that you are eating enough and experiencing less urges to binge.

You do not have to follow this advice, as it is always your choice how to go about this, but you will probably find it relatively easy to increase your food intake with healthy, whole foods, and you will probably find them delicious.  Your meals will become more palatable, and you will feel satisfied, calm, and able to go on with the rest of your life as they are digesting and providing you energy.

I caution against adding processed foods and foods high in sugar to your diet as you increase your food intake.  The reason for this is that these foods are known to not satisfy, not leave you feeling calm or clear, and do not offer benefits to your digestion, skin, joints, and mental well-being.  For someone who has dieted and binged, healing what has been damaged will do wonders not only for the obvious physical reasons, but for your mental health.

Know that you may choose less than healthy foods to increase your intake and it will have no impact on your morality–only your physical and mental health.  You can still stop urges to binge with less than healthy foods, but it might be more difficult.  This is for you to determine.

Mathematically, implementing a few of the ideas above each day can increase your calories by as little as 100 or several hundred.  If this frightens you, remember that if you are dieting and bingeing, you are eating very little followed by periods of eating amounts that are far too much for anyone.  Eating increased portions throughout the day, and not bingeing, always ends up being less food over the long-term, than dieting and bingeing.

Remember that trying to maintain a diet of 1,600 calories or less is likely what got you into the cycle of dieting and bingeing.  Do not feel guilty about increasing your daily calories.  Most people do best on at least 2,000 calories a day.  If this sounds crazy, think about how crazy dieting and bingeing has felt.

It is worth trying something new.

Experiment with this if you are currently dieting and bingeing.  You might come to enjoy this way of eating and you will certainly enjoy less urges to binge.

In Part 5, I will write about bingeing even after you are eating enough.  Bingeing begins as a way for your body to receive enough nutrients after a period of starvation, but often becomes habitual.  The good news is that habits can be changed so read on as we continue the Series: Eating Enough to Reduce Urges to Binge.

For now, leave a comment if you have tried any of these ideas and let us know how they have helped to reduce your urges to binge.

Image from Tumblr.

Binge Eating is Caused by Dieting, Part 3

This is Part 3 of the Series: Binge Eating is Caused by Dieting.

If you haven’t already, read Part 1 and Part 2.

In Part 3, we will talk about eating enough food to lesson frantic urges to binge eat.

It is my opinion that binge eating is caused by dieting–extreme food restriction and that if you did not have the urge to binge eat, you never would.

Binge eating is an action and requires obeying signals from the brain to uncontrollably eat large amounts of food, usually in a short span of time, usually on the foods you have restricted (but not always), and usually alone.  It is often followed by feelings of regret, shame, and guilt, and a period of compensation (voluntary vomiting, over-exericisng, laxative use, or fasting) known as purging.

Binge eating’s nature is cyclical and it quickly becomes a habit.

Here is the cycle of binge eating:

Extreme dieting (food restriction/not eating enough), urges to binge, binge eating, compensation (purging), repeat.

Note that binge urges follow the act of not eating enough.  It is my opinion that by eating enough, binge urges will be dramatically lessoned.  If you continue to eat enough and lesson your urges to binge, you will binge less.  If you binge less, you will compensate less, and if you compensate less, you will be more likely to sustain eating enough.

So, what is enough?

This is difficult to determine on this blog post because everyone’s “enough” will look different, depending on their weight, height, activity level, genetic coding, and metabolism.  It is generally accepted that a six and a half foot and very active man needs to eat more than a five foot two and fairly active woman, but it is less accepted that the five foot two woman needs quite a bit more than she is eating now (provided she is a dieter).

Your most basic metabolic needs (your resting metabolism–energy needed to be in bed all day) is about ten times your body weight.  If you weigh 130 pounds, you need 1300 calories simply to stay alive.

Just to stay alive!  Forget about anything else.  Getting up to make coffee, catching the train, sitting at your desk to work, and definitely forget about any fitness routine.

Dieters are recommended to eat a very low number of calories each day, generally between 1200-1600.  I’ve seen these numbers published in magazines, on websites, and in books.  These numbers are dangerously low to sustain over time.  They are almost always not enough for anyone and will cause the brain to signal urges to binge because it believes (rightfully) that it is starving.

When I dieted (under-ate), I believed that I should be full and satisfied on about 1500 calories a day while maintaining an intense fitness routine.  I could manage to eat so little for a short amount of time (a week, maybe two), but then I would experience intense and distracting urges to eat everything in sight.  It felt strange, because I was health conscious and desired to eat nutritious foods, but when the urges to eat came, it was as if all my education and goals went out the window.  I would binge eat until I couldn’t eat anymore, regain my senses, and vow to get back on track with my low calorie diet.

And by now you probably know how that went.

I tried sustaining a low calorie diet for many years and found it frightening to imagine eating more to lesson my urges to binge.  I thought I would become a glutton, gain too much weight, or live a very sloppy life.

This is irrational because when you calculate all of the calories consumed during my binges for the week and added them to my low calorie days, my calories were always more than if I just ate enough food without dieting and bingeing.

Let’s say I tried to eat 1500 calories a day all week.  By day seven, I eat my normal 1500 calories but then binge on 3000 calories.  If I were to add my calories for the week, they would average to 1930 calories a day.

That may not sound so bad, but let’s say I binged twice in the same week.  Now my calories averaged at 2360 a day.

It was my experience that the more I dieted, restricted, and binged, the more I did it.  It was habit, and it escalated in intensity and frequency so that my binge days increased over each year and completely undid all of my very low calorie days.

If I were to simply eat more each day, let’s say 2000 calories (still debatably low), I would not only feel much fuller on any given day, but I would end up eating less than I did when dieting and bingeing.

This advice might sound far from everything you have read about losing and maintain weight, and it is, but we are slowly inching closer and closer to changing our beliefs about calories in and calories out and as we do, all of the old numbers we have been a slave to will lose their credibility.

Of course the only way to know for sure if eating more will lesson binge urges is to try it for yourself.  I’m not a fan of absolutistic thinking, so you won’t hear me saying that eating more is the only way to stop binge eating, but I will say it’s a very effective way to lesson binge urges, and the likelihood that you continue to binge eat.

You have probably heard that the definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over expecting a different result.

That was my approach with dieting, restricting, and binge eating.  I felt like a crazy person as I tried to fix the same problem by doing the same thing that was not working.

Eating more (enough for you) and not bingeing is possible and it will reduce stress that you may feel around food.  As you binge less (and not at all), your health will improve.  Your body will feel better and your mind will be free from all the focus and energy that bingeing requires.

Why not take a look at how much you are eating over the course of a week or two and observe if you are experiencing urges to binge.  If you are, try adding more nutritious foods to your meals. There is no need to count calories or be obsessive about it if you don’t want to.  Accept that you won’t do this perfectly.  Some days you will eat enough, some days less, some days more.  Start small, if you like, until you are comfortable with larger meals.  Choose foods that will nourish your body, eat in a way that is kind to yourself, and then note the intensity and frequency of your binge urges.

You have nothing to lose–except that which you already don’t want!

The next part of this series will explore resisting urges to binge after you are eating enough.

What do you think about eating more throughout the day to lesson binge urges?  Have you tried this approach?

Share your experiences by leaving a comment!

 

Image from Qomics.

SATURDAY VINTAGE AD: Does Laughter Help Shed Pounds?

Here is an old advertisement touting Marmola tablets as the secret to weight-loss without any of the agonizing behavior changes such as eating less and exercising.  The ad itself contains very little information about what Marmola actually is or how it works but it does offer its readers hope that they can lose weight by just popping a pill into their mouths.

I did a little research on Marmola and it seems it was a popular drug in the early 1900’s containing grains of desiccated thyroid, laxatives and several other ingredients (that I’m uncertain of but the ad states are found on each pill package).  The combination of ingredients indeed helped some people lose a bit of weight, but mostly proved to be ineffective and useless, and for a handful, dangerous to the point of death.  It was ordered to be removed from all market shelves by the Supreme Court within a few decades of its debut.

What struck me about this ad was how it grabs the reader’s attention so fantastically–“Fat Girl Laughs and Grows Slim”.  Wow!  If all we needed was more laughter to reduce weight we could have ended our current obesity epidemic a long time ago.  Evenings filled with stand-up comedy, cartoon books, clown performances and practical jokes could have saved us all from too much fat and kept us entertained.  Not a bad deal.

But that is not what Marmola was really advocating.  Marmola’s purpose was to manipulate hormones, specifically an under-active thyroid, allowing an overweight person to return to their natural, slimmer self effortlessly–“Without Starvation Diets, or Back-Breaking, Bending and Rolling Exercises” (I will need to do further research on the term “rolling exercises”).  The ad implies that your thyroid-correcting experience will be easy and enjoyable (provided you use Marmola’s product), so much, that you might even find yourself laughing off unwanted weight.

While it is true that an under-active thyroid may be a big part of your excess weight, it is not true that simply popping a pill will correct all of the habits that contribute to excess weight over a lifetime.  If you routinely eat too much with an underactive thyroid, you will likely eat too much after it has been regulated and you will still find yourself weighing more than your body naturally prefers.  It’s fantastical thinking to believe years and years of habitual overeating will be put to a halt after taking a pill.  Even though a pill might help correct your hormones, it is more likely that overeating will be halted after your thinking about overeating changes, and then, put very simply, you will eat less because you believe you need less.  This simple truth may actually cause you to laugh and you will probably lose weight, but know it was your new thinking and habit of eating less that provided you these abilities.

No Marmola required.

What do you think about ads touting weight loss as effortless?  Have you ever changed your habits around food without changing your thoughts?  Share your experiences by leaving a comment!

Special Note: If you do suffer from an under-active thyroid, you should be examined by a health professional and you should consider eating a diet that emphasizes foods that are anti-inflammatory and kind to your liver and pancreas.  There is plenty of information online about this or you can email me directly at myrightmindblog@gmail.com to learn more.

Image from Retro Rambling.